What Does it Mean to "De-Center" Men?
- 13 hours ago
- 2 min read
When we talk about de-centering men, it’s not about hating men or ignoring the experiences of those who identify as male. It’s about shifting the cultural, social, and relational lens that so often places men—and particularly white, cisgender, heterosexual men—at the center of power, attention, and authority. It's about exploring and deconstructing systemic norms that negatively impact women, queer, disabled and BIPOC folks. De-centering men asks us to question that default and make space for voices that have been historically silenced.
What It Looks Like in Practice
Noticing: This could be in conversations, classrooms, workplaces, or social movements. It’s noticing who gets interrupted and whose ideas are taken as the most important. Practically, it can mean stepping back and intentionally uplifting marginalized voices.
Listening To Your Own Voice: As women and femme folks, we often dull ourselves down, this is taught, and something we become use to doing throughout childhood and adulthood; we learn to silence our own thoughts and voices, and think about how men may perceive us, or how others see us. Separating the narrative of patriarchy and our own voice is key to learning values and exploring self.
Re-examining Media and Culture: Who do our stories focus on? Whose experiences are normalized in books, films, and social media? De-centering men means being critical of narratives that automatically cast male experiences as universal.
Challenging Patriarchal Assumptions: Patriarchy teaches that men’s needs, ambitions, and feelings matter first, although it may not be obvious, but the systems we exist in have been built on colonization and patriarchy. De-centering men involves questioning specific norms and assumptions, like why male anger is often validated while women’s anger is dismissed, or why leadership is assumed to be masculine.
Practicing Intersectional Awareness: Factors like race, sexual orientation, accessibility needs, and culture is important to acknowledge, the system of patriarchy also negatively impacts men and often prioritizes thin, white, cisgender and able-bodied folks.
Why It Matters
De-centering men doesn’t make men “less important”; it makes society more just, compassionate, and reflective of diverse experiences. It allows us to create spaces where people who’ve historically been sidelined can thrive and be heard. And it challenges internalized narratives that tell us men’s perspectives are inherently more valuable.
Reading & Resource Suggestions
Bell Hooks – Feminism Is for Everybody (2000) A foundational text on feminism that explains how patriarchy impacts everyone and why listening to marginalized voices matters.
Ruth Pearce – Gender and Sexual Diversity: A Critical Introduction (2019) Explores how gendered power structures operate, including how societal focus on men shapes institutions and norms.
Allison Pugh & Naomi Gerstel – Unequal Families (2021) A sociological look at how family structures and societal expectations reinforce male-centered systems.
Adrienne Maree Brown – Pleasure Activism (2019) Offers insights into how shifting attention to marginalized voices, including women and queer folks, creates more liberated, joyful spaces.
Audre Lorde – Sister Outsider (1984) Essays that remind us why centering the margins is critical for justice, healing, and liberation.
De-centering men is a practice, not a one-time shift. It’s about noticing patterns, questioning defaults, and intentionally creating space for voices that have long been silenced. It’s a radical act of listening, presence, and justice.
